Patrice Denman Attorney-at-Law » Dissolution

Facebook and Divorce

admin — Thu, 15 Jul 2010 19:14:21 +0000

Facebook a ‘tool’ for cheating spouses, some say

Facebook is mentioned in about 20 percent of divorce cases, according to a survey of more than 5,000 attorneys.

STORY HIGHLIGHTS

NEW: Facebook responds to the idea of social-networking sites leading to divorces
Ken Savage created a website after discovering his wife’s messages with an ex-boyfriend
Affairs conducted on the web are growing as social-networking sites grow
Study: 81 percent of divorce attorneys use evidence found on networking sites

(CNN) — Ken Savage says that, at first, he welcomed his wife’s new interest in Facebook.

She had recently recovered from a bout with depression and dependence on prescription drugs, and he thought reconnecting with old friends would help get her out of her rut. But he says he became increasingly suspicious of her social networking activity when she began hiding her computer screen when he entered the room.

Savage soon discovered his wife was using the site to meet up with an old boyfriend — an increasingly common occurrence as more and more adults join Facebook.

Savage, 38, of Lowell, Massachusetts, is the creator of FacebookCheating.com, a website he started in 2009 shortly after he discovered his wife’s affair in an effort “to help others cope with someone cheating on them as well as shine light upon someone who is using Facebook to cheat.”

A recent survey by the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers found that 81 percent of divorce attorneys have seen an increase in the number of cases using social networking evidence during the past five years. More than 66 percent of those attorneys said the No. 1 site most often used as evidence is Facebook with its 400 million registered users.

Video: Facebook a tool for infidelity?

RELATED TOPICS

Another recent survey by Divorce-Online.com of more than 5,000 attorneys says Facebook is mentioned in about 20 percent of divorce cases.

“As everyone continues to share more and more aspects of their lives on social networking sites, they leave themselves open to much greater examinations of both their public and private lives in these sensitive situations,” Marlene Eskind Moses, president of the AAML, said in a statement of the survey’s results.

Savage, who says he has nothing against Facebook and uses it regularly to connect with childhood friends, told HLN’s “Prime News” Wednesday that the networking site is simply “a tool for an affair.”

He says that if there is trouble within a marriage or a relationship, “the affair’s going to happen anyway,” but Facebook “makes it much easier.”

Andrew Noyes, a spokesman for Facebook, says the website is not responsible for breaking up marriages.

“It’s ludicrous to suggest that Facebook leads to divorce and we would suggest that anyone who purports to have conducted surveys about the topic also ask respondents about other popular communication channels, such as text messaging, chat sites and email, before jumping to conclusions,” Noyes said.

Stacey Kaiser, a psychotherapist and relationship expert, says she estimates Facebook plays a much larger factor in divorces.

“It’s not just your everyday affair,” Kaiser told “Prime News.” “When it comes to something like Facebook, you are reconnecting with a long-lost love. All those teenage feelings, those college feelings come back again, you feel young again, and it drives you to do something you don’t normally do.”

Savage, who is separated and living apart from his wife, says communication with your spouse is key to keeping your Facebook page as a place to network, not coordinate illicit rendezvous.

“In the beginning when we first got on Facebook, we would openly talk” about shared friends’ new babies and other milestones posted on the site, Savage told HLN.

“When it got real quiet, that was the problem,” he said.

Brenda Wade, a clinical therapist whose self-proclaimed mission is to cut the divorce rate by half, says the mistake most couples make is placing priorities on material things rather than partnership.

“We need to put that energy, that time, that money into the relationship,” she told “Prime News.” “That’s where you want to feel the excitement and the rush.”

Divorce and Credit

admin — Thu, 24 Sep 2009 15:23:25 +0000

Credit and Divorce

Mary and Bill recently divorced. Their divorce decree stated that Bill would pay the balances on their three joint credit card accounts. Months later, after Bill neglected to pay off these accounts, all three creditors contacted Mary for payment. She referred them to the divorce decree, insisting that she was not responsible for the accounts. The creditors correctly stated that they were not parties to the decree and that Mary was still legally responsible for paying off the couple’s joint accounts. Mary later found out that the late payments appeared on her credit report.

If you’ve recently been through a divorce – or are contemplating one – you may want to look closely at issues involving credit. Understanding the different kinds of credit accounts opened during a marriage may help illuminate the potential benefits – and pitfalls – of each.

There are two types of credit accounts: individual and joint. You can permit authorized persons to use the account with either. When you apply for credit – whether a charge card or a mortgage loan – you’ll be asked to select one type.

Individual or Joint Account

Individual Account: Your income, assets, and credit history are considered by the creditor. Whether you are married or single, you alone are responsible for paying off the debt. The account will appear on your credit report, and may appear on the credit report of any “authorized” user. However, if you live in a community property state (Arizona, California, Idaho, Louisiana, Nevada, New Mexico, Texas, Washington, or Wisconsin), you and your spouse may be responsible for debts incurred during the marriage, and the individual debts of one spouse may appear on the credit report of the other.

Advantages/Disadvantages: If you’re not employed outside the home, work part-time, or have a low-paying job, it may be difficult to demonstrate a strong financial picture without your spouse’s income. But if you open an account in your name and are responsible, no one can negatively affect your credit record.

Joint Account: Your income, financial assets, and credit history – and your spouse’s – are considerations for a joint account. No matter who handles the household bills, you and your spouse are responsible for seeing that debts are paid. A creditor who reports the credit history of a joint account to credit bureaus must report it in both names (if the account was opened after June 1, 1977).

Advantages/Disadvantages: An application combining the financial resources of two people may present a stronger case to a creditor who is granting a loan or credit card. But because two people applied together for the credit, each is responsible for the debt. This is true even if a divorce decree assigns separate debt obligations to each spouse. Former spouses who run up bills and don’t pay them can hurt their ex-partner’s credit histories on jointly-held accounts.

Account “Users”

If you open an individual account, you may authorize another person to use it. If you name your spouse as the authorized user, a creditor who reports the credit history to a credit bureau must report it in your spouse’s name as well as in your’s (if the account was opened after June 1, 1977). A creditor also may report the credit history in the name of any other authorized user.

Advantages/Disadvantages: User accounts often are opened for convenience. They benefit people who might not qualify for credit on their own, such as students or homemakers. While these people may use the account, you – not they – are contractually liable for paying the debt.

If You Divorce

If you’re considering divorce or separation, pay special attention to the status of your credit accounts. If you maintain joint accounts during this time, it’s important to make regular payments so your credit record won’t suffer. As long as there’s an outstanding balance on a joint account, you and your spouse are responsible for it.

If you divorce, you may want to close joint accounts or accounts in which your former spouse was an authorized user. Or ask the creditor to convert these accounts to individual accounts.

By law, a creditor cannot close a joint account because of a change in marital status, but can do so at the request of either spouse. A creditor, however, does not have to change joint accounts to individual accounts. The creditor can require you to reapply for credit on an individual basis and then, based on your new application, extend or deny you credit. In the case of a mortgage or home equity loan, a lender is likely to require refinancing to remove a spouse from the obligation.

For More Information

The FTC works for the consumer to prevent fraudulent, deceptive, and unfair business practices in the marketplace and to provide information to help consumers spot, stop, and avoid them. To file a complaint or to get free information on consumer issues, visit ftc.gov or call toll-free, 1-877-FTC-HELP (1-877-382-4357); TTY: 1-866-653-4261. The FTC enters consumer complaints into the Consumer Sentinel Network, a secure online database and investigative tool used by hundreds of civil and criminal law enforcement agencies in the U.S. and abroad.

At Patrice Denman Co. LPA we are have over 20 years of Family Law experience. For a free consultation call us at 440-639-1020